El Apogeo de Fania

Vocals Fry on Lexicon Valley

Lexicon Valley is an entertaining podcast on language from Slate.com.  The main host, Mike Vuolo, is currently on paternity leave, but when he returns, I'll listen in again, no doubt. While mostly enjoying their linguistic dissections of everyday speech, the Lexicon Valley guys--Vuolo and "color man" Bob Garfield--have imbedded in me two brainworms that I just can't seem to shake.

First is the use of the "historical present", a storytelling tendency you've surely noticed which Vuolo & Garfield covered in Ep. #15: "Then Is Now, Now and Then". Now, every time Jon Stewart interviews an author plugging a new non-fiction doorstop, I listen for the historical present. Recently, Doris Kearns Goodwin used it so heavily that had she not been so charming, I may have assumed she had actually hung out with her subjects, Roosevelt and Taft, maybe getting together to lift weights or pastries, depending.  To paraphrase, the author waxed in the present tense, "Roosevelt grows up a feeble boy, so as president he cares deeply about his physical stature and reinvents himself." The constant assumption is that the Kearns Goodwin interview (from about 2:10 onward) is prefaced by an implied "At the time..." because her subject is a historic figure.  Even if the subject matter dictates the verb tense, the conversation is about people and events from 100+ years ago.  The author does mention that she has to "live with these guys" due to the intensity of her research which might explain both her prowess in the genre and her reliance on the historical present.  Nevertheless, in the media and in daily interactions, you'll notice the historical present and you'll probably hear it more often than it's needed.  The L.V. episode eventually approves the use of the historical present to add impact to yarn spinning, but the hosts also admit that its overuse is distracting. I hear it all the time and can't ignore it. If it works within a story, fine, but when it doesn't, it is obnoxious and pretentious.

In Ep. #24: "Do You Creak?" Vuolo also explained another linguistic nuance aptly named "vocal fry". Once you hear it, you'll never stop noticing it.  Also referred to as "creaky voice", the affectation is incessant and annoying.  The hosts and guests discuss the creaky voice in relation to certain young women, adding it to long list of Valley Girl-inspired airs.

Vocal fry waveform in a related article on Speech Talk

Most often the creaky sizzle in the final syllable(s) of a word emphasizes the speaker's authority on the subject or otherwise adds an atmosphere of credibility.  Listen to any talking head on the news--e.g. the guy from IHS Global Insight who Robert Segal inevitably calls every time he needs an NPR soundbite on Yemeni politics in relation to desalination plants. As the gentleman trails off, you can note a lengthening of the last word and a staccato pattern of vocal chord vibrations, like a rusty morning utterance or the sound of an elderly grandparent's voice. Inadvertent vocal fry--just the sound of someone's speech--is completely fine with me, but add the smallest degree of exaggeration and the purposeful creaky voice could just reveal a poser or a flake.

Highly recommended listening: Lexicon Valley addresses countless linguistic phenomena, subtle curiosities about how we say what we say and why.  As modes of communication morph and multiply, old-fashioned speaking and writing continue to be fascinating subjects.  Give an episode a go:

"Lord Grantham, Don Draper's on Hold" -- historically inaccurate vocab. on the boobtube
"Malapropisms: the Pineapple of Linguistic Errors" -- common (sometimes comedic) slips of the tongue
"Undocumented Illegals" --  problematic labels, public relations implications, and dignity issues

Listen: It's Unwinese

Ever hear of Stanley Unwin (1911-2002) and his invented, modified English gibberish called Unwinese? Well, neither had I until a friend (a Brit and a Burger -- from Luxembourg, that is) shared with me this golden folly of yesteryear. Remarkabold!

The fact is this Unwin, a workingman and a family man prior to achieving comedic fame in the 1950's , was a natural voice actor awaiting discovery. Just have a listen to any of these tracks from StanleyUnwin.com. His sound effects, too, are perfectly timed and you'll wish his stories would never end.

photo courtesy of LiberalEngland

It all started at the request of his children around bed time. Just like any good dad, he obliged nightly, but in doing so he began to entertain even himself by telling his stories in a fanciful, rollicking, mixed-up language. The mystery is that Unwinese is completely 'understandabold' because the changes in each word seem to preserve the original just enough. Imagine falling asleep to this!

To see this Unwinese in print is another way to appreciate its complexity. The word combinations, although sometimes befuddling, seem to make sense after some cursory consideration. Open your ears to the sound of your own voice with this 'politito' analysis, again from LiberalEngland:

Fundamold to this new Europe is the swap and trade it. At first we have it all back and forward across the borders with “please have your passy portit open for inspection”.

And this is of a great waste of time, with estimate have it and 20 billion Euro a year – and that’s without the countit and the declimly point in the wrong place!

Unfortumost – all shame and sobit – the Britly people are not keen and soldy. What they ask of the Britly passport? What of the pound and perch and of the Queen and reignit herself?

Hear their cryimost: give me bendy bananas or death and end it!

Find out plenty more about Stanley Unwin, his rocky beginnings, and his unconventional path to English comedy legend in this obituary from the Guardian. Or, as a final throwback, enjoy this clip of dear, dear Prof. Unwin advertising a fancy little piece of technology in its day:

Vocab. Hyped

It's clear and unanimous; the most overused word of the year has got to be...panacea. This term has been bandied about in practically every media forum around, especially in recent months as most discussions in the public forum eventually lead to futile arguments over energy policy. Here is an offering of alternatives to that frankly played-out, antiquated, and progressively stale term so popularized today:



What's the best remedy for our energy ills?



Judging by the cost of that ear, do you still think corn ethanol is the cure-all for our oil addiction?



Do you know of a good medicament for herpes?



Why not offer up a catholicon to save us from a fatal, collective third-degree burn?



Does "Drill, baby, drill!" sound like the magic bullet for the global warming dilemma?



The GOP naively suggests a nepenthe to soothe the pain of our fossil-fueled woes.



Clean coal technologies and offshore drilling merely represent a nostrum to our energy crisis.



A certain few of these options could be the panacea to the problem of the word panacea's frequency in the media as of late. Although, it would be only slightly less surprising for armageddon to ensue than it would be for the talking heads to consult a thesaurus once in a harvest moon.